Friday, May 24, 2002

Never made it home early, people chatting that sort of thing. Still, trip to the airport went off OK, it was when we got home that things went strange.

I'd thought I was going a bit downhill over the last week or so, but hadn't realised how much it had affected Joan. Seems while I was turning in on myself she was also suffering and both her sisters had noticed. They had a big argument about it wednesday night and Sheila got the job of telling her to get me to sort myself out. I was planning to do that anyway, but really wasn't aware of what my problems were doing to Joan. I guess I just turn inwards and lose track of my surroundings to some degree. I do of course feel drastic about not realising I was hurting Joan, which then makes me feel worse about myself but it is better to have it all out in the open to try and work on it.

So today I have seen my doctor and not been in to work. The only appointment I could get was at 9-15, booked just as I got to Ipswich so I had to come straight back again. Still feeling zonked from all the late nights as well as everything else so I phoned in sick and came home. Then proceeded to sleep for 4½ hours so I must have needed it. WIll try to go in on Monday and see how it goes. I know I am better trying to do something rather than sitting around worrying, but I'm not sure I want to be at work either. Oh well, things can only get better, and other such cliches.

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